The Weekend That Was, The Weekend That Is, and an Angry Pirate
Original Post Date: October 24, 2006
Good afternoon, everyone. I have a few things on my mind so I thought I'd excercise what I learned in Kindergarden and share with the rest of the class.
Went to Tampa for the Eagles/Bucs game this weekend with Jimmy Hat, Scuba Steve and TJ. I'll start by saying the Bucs won and I m happy. However, the Eagles lost and Jim is sad. Sorry buddy. Contrary to popular belief, Ybor City is still a cool place to party. We found out that they are very serious about the fact that they do not want drinks outside of bars and clubs as we were almost arrested for walking around with cocktails. However, they apparently are not very serious about openly brawling in the streets. I witnessed maylays between vehicle passengers and pedestrians as a few fights broke out, and all the cops did was take odds as to who would win. Also, there are numerous pizza places open late and drunk-person friendly and they're all great after you've had 30 beers and 10 jager-bombs.
Speaking of 30 beers and 10 jagerbombs...funny story. We get to the hotel, Scuba Steve checks us in while we wait in the car. He reports that the lobby is filled with young people and everyone is cool and friendly. We are excited to party with whatever convention is staying at the hotel with us this weekend. We walk in past the convention, everyone carrying their bags, me carrying my bag, a gallon bottle of Captain Morgan and a bottle of Johnny Walker Black, and we realize what kind of convention it is: Alcohol Annonymous. Yep, and I'm carrying a damn liquor store. Nice. Needless to say, we were not whole-heartedly accepted by the majority of the convention guests. Hey, isn't one of those steps acceptance? Get off your high horse and stop judging me.
There's a club there with a revolving dance floor. This is very funny as our friend TJ was off-his-rocker drunk and would stumble onto the dance floor, then get off 5 minutes later in what he thought was the same place, only to find he was completely accross the other side of the club and quite lost. There's nothing like pulling the old switch-a-roo on a drunk person and moving the entire room while they stumble around confused. Ahh, I chuckle now just thinking about it. Funny thing is, he didn't realize the floor was moving until the car ride home the next day when we told him. Good times.
This weekend, it's O-Town for the Food and Wine Fest at Epcot. I know, I know...everyone thinks "Epcot, ewww, my grandparents like that place." Well, your grandparents are probably drunks, because the only thing to do there is drink in all the countries and that is a good time. And that's what I plan on doing. (Editor's Note: Hey, Chuck Deuce, try not to pass out under a table in Mexico this time. At least not without me.)
Is anyone else sick of Hinder and Nickleback? Every time I turn on MTV or VH1 those bastards are playing. Nice, these "music" stations never play videos anymore, and when they finally do, it's crap. Thanks. Hey, for Christmas, someone get me the new Hanson Greatest Hits album. It's full of Mmm-boppety Goodness!!
On a more personal note, I have a very funny, but very humiliating story to tell. I was debating on keeping it to myself, but it's too funny. Here goes: So after my long weekend away, my GF was "releiving my stress" in an oral manner. Obviously, since I was away a few days, there was some build up, and when it was time for Old Faithful to erupt, she moved out of the way. However, instead of aiming away and keeping everyone involved safe, she pointed it up so it fired a shot of baby batter into the air, a bit of which landed on my cheek. Thanks, babe, just what I needed. So, although I was greatful for the fellacious relations, I unfortunately almost ended up "Angry Pirate-ing" myself. Oh well. Better luck next time.
On that note, I'm outta here. Have a safe weekend and if anyone's gonna be in O-Town, that's Orlando for those of you keeping score at home, holla my way.
I Wanna Sex You Up Sincerely,
Woody
Original Post Date: October 24, 2006
Good afternoon, everyone. I have a few things on my mind so I thought I'd excercise what I learned in Kindergarden and share with the rest of the class.
Went to Tampa for the Eagles/Bucs game this weekend with Jimmy Hat, Scuba Steve and TJ. I'll start by saying the Bucs won and I m happy. However, the Eagles lost and Jim is sad. Sorry buddy. Contrary to popular belief, Ybor City is still a cool place to party. We found out that they are very serious about the fact that they do not want drinks outside of bars and clubs as we were almost arrested for walking around with cocktails. However, they apparently are not very serious about openly brawling in the streets. I witnessed maylays between vehicle passengers and pedestrians as a few fights broke out, and all the cops did was take odds as to who would win. Also, there are numerous pizza places open late and drunk-person friendly and they're all great after you've had 30 beers and 10 jager-bombs.
Speaking of 30 beers and 10 jagerbombs...funny story. We get to the hotel, Scuba Steve checks us in while we wait in the car. He reports that the lobby is filled with young people and everyone is cool and friendly. We are excited to party with whatever convention is staying at the hotel with us this weekend. We walk in past the convention, everyone carrying their bags, me carrying my bag, a gallon bottle of Captain Morgan and a bottle of Johnny Walker Black, and we realize what kind of convention it is: Alcohol Annonymous. Yep, and I'm carrying a damn liquor store. Nice. Needless to say, we were not whole-heartedly accepted by the majority of the convention guests. Hey, isn't one of those steps acceptance? Get off your high horse and stop judging me.
There's a club there with a revolving dance floor. This is very funny as our friend TJ was off-his-rocker drunk and would stumble onto the dance floor, then get off 5 minutes later in what he thought was the same place, only to find he was completely accross the other side of the club and quite lost. There's nothing like pulling the old switch-a-roo on a drunk person and moving the entire room while they stumble around confused. Ahh, I chuckle now just thinking about it. Funny thing is, he didn't realize the floor was moving until the car ride home the next day when we told him. Good times.
This weekend, it's O-Town for the Food and Wine Fest at Epcot. I know, I know...everyone thinks "Epcot, ewww, my grandparents like that place." Well, your grandparents are probably drunks, because the only thing to do there is drink in all the countries and that is a good time. And that's what I plan on doing. (Editor's Note: Hey, Chuck Deuce, try not to pass out under a table in Mexico this time. At least not without me.)
Is anyone else sick of Hinder and Nickleback? Every time I turn on MTV or VH1 those bastards are playing. Nice, these "music" stations never play videos anymore, and when they finally do, it's crap. Thanks. Hey, for Christmas, someone get me the new Hanson Greatest Hits album. It's full of Mmm-boppety Goodness!!
On a more personal note, I have a very funny, but very humiliating story to tell. I was debating on keeping it to myself, but it's too funny. Here goes: So after my long weekend away, my GF was "releiving my stress" in an oral manner. Obviously, since I was away a few days, there was some build up, and when it was time for Old Faithful to erupt, she moved out of the way. However, instead of aiming away and keeping everyone involved safe, she pointed it up so it fired a shot of baby batter into the air, a bit of which landed on my cheek. Thanks, babe, just what I needed. So, although I was greatful for the fellacious relations, I unfortunately almost ended up "Angry Pirate-ing" myself. Oh well. Better luck next time.
On that note, I'm outta here. Have a safe weekend and if anyone's gonna be in O-Town, that's Orlando for those of you keeping score at home, holla my way.
I Wanna Sex You Up Sincerely,
Woody
posted by Woody at
2:22 PM
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