White Trash Olympics Update
Event: Arm Wrestling/Domestic Abuse
A Port St. Lucie, FL man was arrested over the weekend for domestic battery on his ladyfriend. While being arrested, the man, who was apparently inspired by Will Ferrell's claims of driving a Dodge Stratus, yelled "I'm a champion arm wrestler! I can bench press 600 lbs! I'm gonna kick all your (expletive) out!"
That you for that, Florida. Whenever one of those other states tries to out-white-trash us, we do our best and go for the gold!
West Virginia offers a heartwarming teacher-bangs-students story? Psshh, we've got the Student-Banging-Teacher-of-the-Year in Debra Lafave...and she's actually hot.
Kentucky had a guy forced to eat his own beard in a lawn-mower fight?
We'll see your beard-eater and raise you a guy who crammed 63% of the products sold at CVS into his bunghole in an attempt to smuggle them into jail.
Nice try, rednecks of the world....give Florida a call when you're ready to get serious.
Event: Arm Wrestling/Domestic Abuse
A Port St. Lucie, FL man was arrested over the weekend for domestic battery on his ladyfriend. While being arrested, the man, who was apparently inspired by Will Ferrell's claims of driving a Dodge Stratus, yelled "I'm a champion arm wrestler! I can bench press 600 lbs! I'm gonna kick all your (expletive) out!"
That you for that, Florida. Whenever one of those other states tries to out-white-trash us, we do our best and go for the gold!
West Virginia offers a heartwarming teacher-bangs-students story? Psshh, we've got the Student-Banging-Teacher-of-the-Year in Debra Lafave...and she's actually hot.
Kentucky had a guy forced to eat his own beard in a lawn-mower fight?
We'll see your beard-eater and raise you a guy who crammed 63% of the products sold at CVS into his bunghole in an attempt to smuggle them into jail.
Nice try, rednecks of the world....give Florida a call when you're ready to get serious.
posted by Woody at
11:56 AM
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